Monday, March 28, 2005

Ancient Hungarian Fertility Rite

So Easter in Hungary is a riot. First of all, it is a huge deal. Second, it is the vestigial remnant of some ancient pagan fertility ritual. If you are a man, you have the right to go from house to house, with the womanfolk coming to the door to greet you. You recite a poem to the women. I will translate it here. Listen to this:

I have been to a green forest
I have seen a blue violet
It wanted to wilt
Can I water you?

It rhymes in Hungarian. They are suppose to say yes to this and bow their head. Then you get to 'water' them by sprinkling perfume on their hair. You can imagine how badly the women stink by the end of the day. The perfume is different from man to boy to man to boy. God awful Russian perfume mixed with Chanel no. 5 mixed with Creed mixed with some strange cologne. It is truly stupifying. After the women have been assured of 'not wilting', they reward the perfume bearing poets with a gift. This is usually a painted egg, but it can be a shiny coin (worth about a nickel) or candy. There is no age limit to this ritual.

On an unrelated note, I really sympathize with the Japanese chef in Dumb & Dumber. I will say nothing else.

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