I'm pretty sure I'm depressed

because I went through all my papers to look for a copy of my diploma (I sort of found a document to prove that I have a law degree) for this translation bid... and I am just sitting here looking at blogs and things and I don't feel like putting them away. So I am now lying on my bed surrounded by a god awful mess. I am a poster child for depression - the only thing missing is a box-o-wine.

I've been having issues... I even put up a tearful entry about it for about 3 hours on Sunday but then I realized that it's too personal to share it with the world at large so I took it off. Maybe I will talk about it, eventually, but not at the moment... It's a girlfriend issue.

I am fairly certain I am depressed because I can't find the remote and the TV is stuck on the cartoon network and I don't have the willpower to go through the mess so I can change the channel. I won't change the channel manually, therein lies madness. The Cartoon Network is currently playing a 24 minute long playing-card commercial invented in Japan and drawn in Korea. It involves screaming bug-eyed kids who are somehow cool and popular despite spending all their time playing with geeky cards.

I am going to the local offices of a famous men's magazine (yes, the most famous one) to find a cover image for my first book... the publisher will pay for it. The lengths I go to for my art... This be a terrible thing methinks.

I have the second book up on screen but I simply don't feel like working.

I went to a bank and opened an account (one in pounds and one in forints) and tried to deposit my check from the publisher. Naturally, the bank just went apeshit about it. Costs costs costs, and it will take a month for the check to clear. Fuck them, I say. I will email the publisher and ask them to send my money by wire transfer. The alternative is 50-120 dollars in costs for a check that is not that big... I am babbling.

Went to an expat event last night - I won the poetry contest. The prize is this santa figure who sings while sitting in a rocking chair. It is awesome! I would put up a picture of it but I won't because I don't have a digital camera because I am stuck in the frigging stone age here, watching cable and surfing the net. The theme of the poetry contest was pop-music, so I wrote a poem about Duran Duran. I don't have the poem. Well, maybe I do, but I am too run-down to look for it.

Transformers - Cybertron is coming on. Optimus Prime is talking in this strangely warlike Hungarian. Hungarian does not work too well for warlike robot-speak. 'transform!' translates as 'atalakulas' and Starscream has been translated into Ustokos, which means 'Comet'. What the fuck? Starscream is NOT Comet. Right now the inevitable human sidekick is bitching at the robots for building their headquarters without VENTILATION AND BATHROOMS. What the fuck?

I don't get the obsession with having 3-5 suburbanite kids on the Autobot staff. Yeah yeah, I know it's a toy commercial...

TWP version of Transformers episode:
"Optimus! have you seen (let's name 'stupid kid #4' 'Billy') Billy?"
"No...?"
"Turn around, Optimus..."
"Okay?"
"Fuck, Optimus, you sat on him... There, it's that smear on your left thigh..."
"Autobots, transform!"
"Why?"
"What do you mean, why?"
"I mean... we can fly in robot mode. Why would I transform into a 1978 Ford Pinto? I mean, why? We keep running around as robots anyway, it's not like it's a disguise thing..."
blah blah blah blah. You get the idea.

I consumed the following food/drink items for dinner: a bag of hazelnuts; half a pound of smoked ham; .3 pounds of cheese; a liter of carbonated mineral water. My heart hurts. Seriously. It does.